


Happiness is a Warm Cheeseburger

by geekkitty (braezenkitty)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Misunderstandings, Negative Thoughts, Self-Doubt, Supernatural Writing Challenge, implied BDSM, implied depression, wow i implied a lot of stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-17 14:42:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5874535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/braezenkitty/pseuds/geekkitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam & Jess convince Dean to go to a yoga and meditation retreat in the Santa Cruz mountains. Dean is a grump, until he realizes the yoga teacher is a gorgeous dark-haired, blue-eyed, walking hunk of sex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happiness is a Warm Cheeseburger

Dean glared at Sam where he sat cross-legged on a yoga mat a foot away. The fucker had his eyes closed, no doubt so he could ignore the death rays Dean was shooting at him. Sam’s chest rose and fell with his steady breaths, face slack and relaxed, and Dean rolled his eyes and huffed.

“Dean,” Sam said without opening his eyes, “you gotta relax man. This retreat is supposed to help you increase feelings of well-being and happiness, not stress you out.”

“Yeah, well maybe if I had been given a _choice_ in the matter I wouldn’t _be_ stressed out.”

“Dude, you could’ve said no.”

“And would you have taken that as an answer?”

“Probably not.”

“I rest my case.”

“Well, you’re here now, so why not make the best of it? Just go with the flow, do some yoga, do some meditation, get a massage. Self care is important. You’re never gonna be truly happy until you take care of yourself.”

“I am happy, Sammy. All I need is my baby and an open road in front of us, and all my cares are gone.”

“Dean, your relationship with your car borders on unhealthy. You go on more dates with her than with actual people.”

“Well, maybe that’s because she understands me better than most actual people.”

“Jesus, you better watch out or she’s gonna go all Christine and start killing people for you.”

“Shh!” Jess leaned over to peer at Dean from the other side of Sam, glaring at both of them in turn. “Will you two please stop bickering for five minutes so a girl can have a little peace and quiet and get her namaste on?”

Dean rolled his eyes forward and slouched over to let his elbows rest on his knees. He would keep his mouth shut for Jess’ sake, but he couldn’t resist muttering “Jerk” under his breath so only Sammy could hear.

“Bitch,” Sammy muttered back.

Dean suppressed the urge to slug his little brother’s arm. That’s what would make him really happy right now. If he did that though, Sammy would slug him back, and then it would be on. They’d end up wrestling in the middle of this room of peace loving hippie freaks until one of them had the other in a choke hold. That’d get them kicked out for sure, and Jess would be pissed. She’d probably refuse to bake him pie for the foreseeable future. And that would definitely affect Dean’s happiness level.

Thoughts of pie were interrupted when Dean heard the large wooden barn door slide closed at the back of the room. Must be time for the class to start. Dean was glad, the sooner they got started the sooner this would be over and he could go back to his room, get something to eat and maybe take a nap. Thinking about pie had reminded him that he hadn’t had breakfast. His stomach growled and he hoped nobody else could hear it.

Leaning back on his hands, Dean turned his head to see a dark haired man with his back to the class, fiddling with the stereo system at the back of the room. The dude looked pretty fit, long and lean with broad shoulders and strong arms. The blue t-shirt he wore was fitted and Dean admired the way it clung to his shoulders and biceps. Dean’s eyes drifted lower, where the dark blue cotton of the guy’s loose shorts draped over what looked like a very shapely ass and thick, muscled thighs. Yoga definitely seemed to have done that body some good.

“Ahem.”

Dean’s eyes snapped to Sammy, who was looking at him with one eyebrow raised and a half smile.

“What?” Dean said in a curt whisper, trying to convey annoyance without raising his voice and setting Jess off again.

Sam just shook his head, turning to face forward, his shoulders shaking with stifled laughter. Dean glared, but turned forward when the sound of a soft, low flute accompanied by a deep droning instrument that seemed to reverberate in his mind. The dark haired man had gotten the music started and was now walking toward the front of the classroom.

“Good morning everyone, welcome to beginner’s yoga. My name is Castiel.” The guy, Castiel, had an unexpectedly deep, rumbly voice. He spoke softly, yet his voice carried easily through the room. Dean wondered what that voice would sound like up close, intimate. When Castiel turned to face the class and sunk to his knees on the yoga mat waiting for him at the front of the room, Dean felt his jaw go slack. _Those eyes. Holy shit_ , they were the bluest eyes Dean had ever seen.

“I’ll be guiding you through a series of yoga postures meant to relax your mind and invigorate your body.” _Oh yeah_ , Dean thought, _I can already feel my body invigorating_. He smiled sheepishly to himself at his own dumb innuendo. He let his eyes drift lower again, appreciating the front view this time, and taking his time trailing back up Castiel’s body. 

“Please remember, you should each take things at your own pace and listen to your body. There are blocks and blankets and straps on the shelves at the back of the room. Please don’t hesitate to use them.” Dean unconsciously pulled his bottom lip into his mouth and let his teeth drag against it, thinking about other things he could use the straps for. His gaze slid up to the collar of Castiel’s v-neck t-shirt, skimming over the hollow of his throat and up to pink lips surrounded by dark stubble.

“I don’t want anyone injuring themselves trying to force their body too deep into a pose.” _He said deep_ ... Dean tried to suppress a grin. Great, this guy had his mind fully regressed to that of a horny teenager. Still struggling to hold back his smile, despite feeling like an idiot, Dean looked up and was shocked to realize Castiel was looking right at him. _Oh shit, he probably thinks I’m some kind of pervert_ , Dean thought, _not that he’d be wrong, exactly_. Clearing his throat and wiping the smile off his face, Dean sat up straight and tried to look as unperverted as possible. To Dean’s surprise, a corner of Castiel’s pink lips quirked up into a lopsided grin before his gaze slid away to address the room again.

“We’re going to start with some deep breathing exercises. Everyone close your eyes and sit up straight. Imagine your spine connected to and reaching toward the earth underneath you, and a string pulling your head and neck up towards the sky. Now breathe in through your belly...”

Dean did his best to shut his thoughts down so he could listen and do exactly as Castiel instructed, breathing in and out slowly and deeply. He felt his body relax and his mind quiet, completely focused on the feel of his breath as it moved through his body and the sound of Castiel’s voice. As Castiel led the class through various postures, Dean did his best to copy Castiel’s movements exactly. Castiel periodically reminded the class to check in with their bodies, keep their spines extended, keep breathing, and after about half an hour of this Dean was so zenned out that he completely forgot about his perverted mind’s inappropriate thoughts from earlier.

Which is why he was caught totally off guard when he heard Castiel’s voice from mere inches away, warm breath gusting against Dean’s ear. “May I adjust you?”

“Uh,” Dean answered, suddenly flustered, “yeah?”

He felt a hand settle warm between his shoulder blades. They were in a posture Castiel had called ‘down faced dog’ and Dean’s hands were on the floor in front of him while his ass was lifted high in the air. He turned his head slightly, as awkward as that was in this position, and could see only tanned feet and strong legs covered in dark hair.

“Keep your head forward, in line with your spine, and lower your chest toward the ground,” Castiel’s voice rumbled from above and slightly behind him while the hand between his shoulder blades applied gentle pressure then slid down toward his lower back, “now stretch your arms and shoulders forward while you lift your pelvis to the sky.”

Dean did his best to focus and ignore the fluttering in his abdomen, lifting and stretching as much as he could. He wondered if Castiel was checking his ass out, but shut that thought down almost immediately. This was Castiel’s job, he was a professional, not some horny teenager like Dean apparently still was.

“Good, that’s perfect,” Castiel said, then just as suddenly as it had arrived the hand on his back was gone and Castiel was walking away. Dean suppressed a disappointed groan at the sudden lost of contact. The fourteen year old part of Dean’s brain helpfully suggested he get all the poses wrong from here on out so Castiel would come back and touch him again, rumbling commands and praise into his ears.

 _Jesus_ , Dean thought, _get a hold of yourself. Poor guy’s just doing his job, he doesn’t need some horny loser going full pervert on him_. Dean gritted his teeth and focused on his breathing. He moved through the rest of the postures as Castiel announced them, resolutely ignoring any kinky thoughts that arose until he finally got back to his zen state. The rest of the class passed without incident, and when he finally arose from where he laid flat on his back in the final posture (one Castiel had called savasana) Dean felt clear headed and lighter than he had in years.

He was definitely coming to tomorrow’s yoga class.

 

*****

 

Dean prodded at the bowl of little brown things on the buffet in front of him. The label said it was ‘Lentil Salad’. Dean wasn’t sure what lentils were, but this sure didn’t look like any salad he’d ever seen, and not for the first time that day he found himself fervently wishing for a cheeseburger. He scanned the rest of the buffet, gaze sliding over bowl after bowl after plate of vegetable based dishes. Rabbit food. Nothing but rabbit food.

Dean took a deep breath in and let it out in a frustrated huff. How did Sam expect him to ‘find happiness’ when he couldn’t even get a decent meal with some meat in it? Dean was going to starve, he’d waste away into a wraith by the end of this damn retreat. He wished he hadn’t ridden with Sam and Jess in their Prius so he could take a drive into town to grab some real food.

“You look disappointed.”

Dean jumped in surprise at the sudden proximity of a gravelly voice behind him, almost dropping his (thankfully still empty) plate. He turned, gaze locking onto a pair of the brightest blue eyes he’d ever seen, and his brain seemed to forget words for several heartbeats.

“Uhh...” _Say something, stupid._ “There’s no cheeseburgers.” _Jesus_ , Dean reprimanded himself silently, _of course there aren’t any cheeseburgers, this is a vegetarian retreat._ The gorgeous blue eyes lit up and the man, Castiel, his brain supplied, finally starting to work again, broke into a gummy grin as he laughed. Dean gave a lopsided smile in response, feeling like an idiot, but enjoying the way Castiel’s face crinkled with mirth.

“I’ve suggested they put cheeseburgers on the menu several times,”Castiel said, stepping around Dean to grab a plate from the buffet, “but the chef refuses. It’s like this place is anti-meat or something.”

Dean grinned in response to Castiel’s sarcastic comment and smirk. _Cute_ and _funny_. “If you ask me, cheeseburgers should be on the menu at any place that claims to help you find happiness.”

“I couldn’t agree more, cheeseburgers make me very happy.”

“Really? But you work here, teach yoga, you’re not a vegetarian?”

“Technically I am. Just a poor example of one. Cheeseburgers are my weakness.”

“Mine too. Maybe if we both go harass the chef they’ll put burgers on the menu for tomorrow.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea. In the meantime though, I could give you some pointers on what’s good here.”

“That would be awesome. I can’t tell if half of this is even food, or something someone foraged out of the forest.”

“Most of it is probably both. I’m Castiel, by the way.”

“Dean.” Dean said, transferring his plate to his left hand so he could grasp Castiel’s outstretched hand. His hand was soft and smooth, his grip firm, and Dean was momentarily ashamed of the calluses that riddled his own hand. “Good to meet you, uh, Castiel. That’s a unique name you got.”

“My mother was very much into Angels, she got it from some story about the Angel of Thursday.”

“Huh. I was named after my grandma, Deanna. My mom’s mom.” Dean cleared his throat, he was rambling. “So uh food, what’s good here?”

“Right, well the lentil salad tastes much better than it looks. And the cornbread is really good.”

They worked their way down the buffet, Castiel pointing out what was good and what to avoid. Dean piled everything Castiel suggested onto his plate, ending up with way more food than he would have gotten if he had been left to his own devices. They had reached the end of the buffet and Dean realized he had to make a move if he wanted to keep chatting with Castiel, and he really really did. Not only did the guy have the sexiest voice he’d ever heard, but he was actually pretty funny and really easy to talk to.

“So, Cas—is it ok if I call you Cas?”

“That would be acceptable, Dean.”

“I’m here with my brother and his girlfriend, but they ditched me to go have some couples massage, and um, I kinda hate eating alone... would you like to join me?”

“I usually eat out on the patio,” Cas started, then turned to walk out the door. Dean’s heart dropped. He started to walk over to an empty table, resigned to eat alone and about to throw out some meaningless phrase normal adults seemed to use all the time... good talking to you, see you later. But then Cas stopped in the doorway, turning his head to look at Dean. “You coming?”

Dean smiled, “Yeah, I’m coming.”

“So you don’t seem to be the meditating type.” Cas set his plate down on the table farthest from the dining room entry, in a shady spot under a tree.

“How’d you guess?” Dean laughed, setting his plate down in sitting in the chair next to Cas.

“Well it was pretty obvious in the meditation class earlier. You couldn’t sit still.”

“Yeah,” Dean laughed nervously, “ you were there?”

“A few rows behind you. It was a little bit distracting.”

“I’m sorry man,” Dean laughed, ducking his head sheepishly. “My brother, Sam, has been all gung ho about this meditation stuff since his girlfriend Jess got him into it last year. He thinks it’ll help me ‘center myself’, get outta my own head for a bit. But I have a hard time sitting still if I don’t have anything occupying my mind.”

“That’s understandable. Meditation is a skill that must be cultivated. You might have better luck with more physical forms of meditation.”

“Like yoga?”

“Exactly, or running, or even hiking. You seemed to enjoy the yoga class this morning.”

“Yeah, I did enjoy that.” Dean smiled, thinking to himself that it probably didn’t have as much to do with the activity as it did the teacher.

“Well, I’m glad you enjoyed the class. Are you planning on coming back tomorrow?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“I’ll look forward to seeing you there. And if you want to try something different, you could join me for a hike tomorrow. There’s some great trails through the redwoods here. I was planning on going after lunch.”

“That sounds awesome Cas, anything to get out of another meditation class where I have to sit on my ass doing nothing but trying not to think for an hour.”

“Great.” Cas smiled, almost timidly Dean thought, then stood and started gathering up his empty plate and utensils. “I have to get to another appointment, but I’ll see you tomorrow. Meet me at the prayer wheel out front at one. Make sure you’re wearing sturdy shoes and layer your clothing, it can get cold under the trees.”

“Yes, sir,” Dean said flippantly, hoping to elicit more of a response than the shy smiles he’d gotten so far. Dean was rewarded when Cas’ left eyebrow shot up in response, his blue eyes staring Dean down with unexpected intensity. Dean had expected at most a flirty response, maybe a laugh if Cas wasn’t actually into him, in which case Dean would have known to lay off the flirting. But that eyebrow made the butterflies in his stomach start fluttering again, and he felt as if he was laid out bare underneath that stare.

“Goodbye, Dean,” Cas finally replied, gifting Dean with a knowing smile, before turning to take his dishes inside. “Don’t be late.”

“No, sir,” Dean heard the words come out of his mouth before he consciously thought about saying them. He sat in his chair, enjoying the view as Cas walked away and amending his original impression of the man. Cute, funny, kind, with the hint of a dominant streak... Dean forced himself to take a few deep breaths to calm his nerves. It had been a while since he’d been with anyone. Amara had been the last. Amara, who had enjoyed being his Domme and making him beg for the oblivion of subspace, making him think she was the only one who could take him there. He’d lost himself in her so easily, and it had taken him months to admit that their relationship wasn’t healthy and to go to Sam for help. It had taken a few more months to work up the courage to finally break things off with her for good. He never wanted to lose himself like that again.

Dean shook his head, willing thoughts of Amara away. Cas was not Amara, Amara was never nice to him just for the sake of being nice, there was always some ulterior motive with her. Cas didn’t seem to want anything from him at all, except maybe his company.

Dean stood, clearing his dishes off the table to take them to the collection area inside. He’d just have to be careful and take things slow. Despite any worries, something about Cas made him feel good, safe, and he wanted to get to know him better.

 

*****

 

Dean woke the next morning to the smell of coffee. He stretched his limbs, his feet poking out of the covers at the end of the twin bed. Next time Sam convinced him to go to some hippie resort he was going to have to make sure the beds were long enough to fit all of his six foot one inch frame. He didn’t know how his sasquatch brother managed to fit his giant frame onto the tiny beds.

Dean peered out of one eye, wondering where his brother was and if he was the source of the coffee smell. Sure enough, Sam and Jess were sitting at the small table their room contained, whispering to each other over steaming mugs.

“Rude,” Dean grumbled, closing his eyes and pulling the blankets over his head, which left his toes uncovered. He groaned and attempted to pull his feet back into the warmth of his blanket cocoon.

“Good morning to you too, princess,” Sam said, while Jess giggled. “What are you so grumpy about?”

Dean sighed and rolled his eyes, even though he knew nobody could see the gesture while he was under his blanket. “You wake me up at the buttcrack of dawn with the smell of coffee, but keep it all to yourselves... like I said, rude.”

“Dude, if you’d emerge from your nest of blankets you’d see that there is a cup for you on your nightstand.”

Dean peeked out to see that there was, in fact, a steaming mug sitting mere inches from his face. He sat up, grumbling his thanks, and took a sip. “Oh, that’s good,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” Sam said, no doubt with full bitchface going on, but Dean had closed his eyes again, leaning his head back against the wall behind him. He ignored Sammy’s annoyed tone in favor of letting the caffeine flood through his system while his body fought to gain full consciousness.

“Why is it so early?” he grumbled.

“Dean, it’s already eight thirty,” Jess answered, “we let you sleep in.”

“Eight thirty? Crap,” Dean set his mug down and swung his legs out of the covers and over the edge of the bed, rubbing his hands over his face, “yoga starts at nine, right? I gotta get ready.”

“Get ready?” Sam said with a smirk. “Yesterday we had to practically drag you out of bed and you went in your pjs. You didn’t even want to go.”

“Yeah, well today I want to go. I felt good after yesterday’s class, isn’t that why you brought me here? To get centered and find happiness, all that hippie bullshit?”

“Yeah, but—” Sam started, but stopped when Jess put a hand on top of his where it laid on the table between them.

“That’s exactly why we brought you here, Dean,” she said, staring meaningfully at Sam while she spoke. She turned to Dean and continued with a smile, “We’re glad you’re enjoying it. Are you coming to the meditation class after lunch again too?”

“Uh, no,” Dean answered, standing and stretching while looking around for his shower supplies and towel. “Sitting still for an hour trying not to think was just an exercise in frustration. Cas says I should try something more physical, so we’re going for a hike.”

“Cas?” Sam asked, raising an eyebrow and looking at Dean over the edge of his mug before taking a sip and setting it down. “You mean Castiel, the yoga teacher?”

“Yeah, like I said, Cas.”

“The one who you were practically undressing with your eyes in class yesterday?”

Dean shot a glare at Sam’s stupid smirking face, turning to rummage through his bag for a fresh set of clothes rather than give his brother the satisfaction of seeing him blush. “Is that a problem?” he asked. Dean thought he heard a thump and a stifled “ow” from Sam’s direction.

“Of course that’s not a problem, Dean,” Jess said.

“Explains why you need to ‘get ready’ for yoga,” Sam giggled, and Dean heard another thump. “Ow, Jess! Stop hitting me!”

“Stop teasing your brother then! You should be encouraging him, you know he hasn’t been interested in anyone since _you know who_.”

“Guys,” Dean sighed, bundling his clean clothes, towel and shower supplies in his arms and turning to face them, “you do realize I am in the same room with you and I can hear everything you say, right?”

“Sorry,” Jess replied, a little sheepishly, “we just want you to be happy.”

“Yeah,” Sam chimed in, “you want us to hire Cas to give you a massage?”

Dean rolled his eyes while Sam struggled not to laugh and Jess smacked his arm. “Please don’t. I’ll see you guys in yoga.”

“Are you sure? We could tell the rest of the students that class is cancelled so you can get a private lesson from Cas!”

“Shut up, Sammy!” Dean called, letting the bathroom door shut out the sound of his jerk brother’s laughter.

 

*****

 

Thankfully Jess had somehow convinced Sam to go on a hike with her instead of going to yoga, so Dean didn’t have to listen to more of his little brother’s attempts at teasing him. Dean arrived at the class just a couple minutes before it was supposed to start, and set out his mat in an open space close to the wall opposite the one where the stereo equipment was set up. There was a cute petite blonde sitting on a mat between him and the wall, and he nodded to her and smiled as he sat down cross-legged.

“Hi,” she said, giving him a little wave, “I’m Julia.”

“Dean,” he replied, hoping she hadn’t taken his smile as a flirtation. Dean didn’t not like girls, but he was more than a bit distracted by a certain dark haired blue eyed man that had been haunting his dreams and most of his waking thoughts.

“Did you take this class yesterday?”

“Yeah,” Dean answered, “my first yoga class ever.”

“Oh, really? What did you think?” Dean was about to answer but she took a breath and continued before he could get a word in. “The teacher is really good, his voice is so relaxing.”

“Yeah, I enjoyed it. And the teacher is pretty great.”

“And it doesn’t hurt that he’s so easy on the eyes.”

Dean laughed, but he couldn’t disagree with her.

“Oh, come on, don’t tell me you didn’t notice. I know guys always say they can’t tell if another guy’s good looking because they’re afraid admitting it will damage their masculinity or something, but Castiel is downright dreamy, anyone can see that.” Her eyes unfocused as she looked off into the middle distance, no doubt picturing the dreamy yoga teacher in some skin tight yoga pants or compromising position or something.

“I can’t say I hadn’t noticed, actually,” Dean replied, chuckling and turning to the back of the room, where Cas had finally arrived and was hooking his ipod up to the stereo equipment. He definitely was not hard on the eyes. Cas turned to the front of the class when the music started, walking to his mat without even glancing at Dean. Dean tried not to let that bother him. He probably just hadn’t seen Dean where he was sitting off to the side of the room.

Cas greeted the class, thanking everyone for coming back for a second class, then guided them into more deep breathing exercises. When they started a sequence of postures Cas called the Warrior poses, Cas left his spot at the front of the room to walk around and adjust students who needed it. Dean held each pose, watching Cas when he came into his field of vision, but not once did he come anywhere near Dean. Again, Dean tried not to let it bother him. Maybe he was just doing better at the poses today, so he didn’t need the extra help.

A small voice told him it was probably because he had freaked Cas out at dinner the night before, that he had completely misread the situation and Cas really didn’t want anything more to do with him. He tried to ignore that voice, but as the class stretched on and Cas continued to avoid him, not even making eye contact, Dean couldn’t help but think that must be the problem.

By the time Cas guided the class into savasana, Dean was so stuck in his own dark thoughts he wasn’t sure he could lie still. He didn’t want Cas to think anything was wrong though, it was bad enough he had made the guy so uncomfortable that he wanted to completely ignore Dean, so he laid down and did his best not to fidget.

As soon as Cas rung the bell to signal that they should begin to bring their awareness back, Dean’s eyes flew open. He longed to get up and run out of the room, but he forced himself to remain calm and rise slowly with the rest of the class. Finally, Cas leaned forward with his hands at his heart, bidding the class “Namaste,” and Dean began rolling up his mat. He had to get out of there. When his mat was rolled up he gave Julia a half-assed wave when she said goodbye, and tried not to run all the way back to his room.

 

*****

 

A few hours later, Dean had eaten a late breakfast, finished the book he had brought with him (it was a short one, and one he’d read before), and taken a nap. He was now lying face down in his bed, toes dangling over the edge, agonizing over whether he should meet Cas for the hike they’d planned the evening before. The last thing Cas had said was not to be late, but after this morning’s yoga class, Dean wasn’t sure he wanted to go out there just to find that Cas had stood him up.

Dean’s thoughts were interrupted when the alarm on his phone went off, alerting him that it was five minutes to one and he should be tying his shoes and heading out the door if he wanted to be on time. Dean groaned and slid his finger across the screen, shutting the alarm off. He slid off the end of the bed till his feet hit the ground, then lifted himself up and turned around to sit and pull his shoes on. He’d go out and see if Cas was there, and if he was Dean would ask him if he really wanted Dean to come along on his hike, or if he was just putting up with Dean because he was a paying guest. The last thing Dean wanted was to make Cas feel like he had to hang out with Dean to avoid a messy situation that could cost him his job.

Dean tied his shoes, pulling his sweats down over his socks, then stood and grabbed his hoodie. He threw it on and zipped up the front, then grabbed his bottle of water on his way out the door. Dean’s stomach grumbled on the short walk to the prayer wheel, reminding him that he had skipped lunch, but he still felt queasy because of his nerves so he ignored it. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to find Castiel waiting for him or not. It might be easier if he wasn’t there.

Walking up the path that lead to the raised concrete platform that held the prayer wheel, Dean didn’t see Cas on either of the two benches flanking the wheel that were visible to him from this angle. His heart sunk and he was about to turn around and head back to the room, when a voice from behind stopped him.

“Hello, Dean.”

Dean turned to see Cas walking towards him, coming out of the building where the spa facilities and massage rooms were located. “Hey, Cas, nice timing.” Despite his roiling nerves, he felt a smile spread across his face.

“We had an appointment,” Cas said, smiling back at Dean. “Come on.”

Dean followed Cas across the small parking lot to a steep path that lead away from the resort and into the trees. They walked in silence for a while, both breathing heavily while walking uphill. Dean was also still unsure how to act; he didn’t want to be too forward or make Cas uncomfortable. As they walked deeper into the forest, the path eventually leveled out and the trees thickened, allowing less light to filter down through the redwoods. Everything seemed a little damp, even though it was summer and probably hadn’t rained in weeks. The air became cooler and Dean breathed in deeply, letting it calm him from the inside out.

“You seem quiet today,” Cas said, breaking the silence, “everything ok?”

“Yeah,” Dean debated lying and telling Cas he was fine, or just being honest and risking Cas not feeling the same. He decided he would never be happy with himself if he didn’t take a chance. “Wasn’t sure you were gonna show.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed and he quirked his head to the side, turning to meet Dean’s eyes. “Why wouldn’t I?”

They walked in silence for a couple of steps, Cas waiting for an answer and Dean trying to think of an acceptable answer that wouldn’t weird Cas out. “Look, Cas,” he began, taking a deep breath to center himself, “I like you, and nothing would make me happier than to get to know you better and maybe take you out sometime. But I know you’re an employee here, and I’m a guest, and I don’t want you to feel like you have to be nice to me because your job depends on guests being happy here—”

“Is that what you think? That I’m spending time with you and being nice to you because I’ll get fired if I don’t?”

“Well,” when Cas said it like that it did sound a little ridiculous, “I couldn’t rule it out as a possibility. Especially after you seemed to totally ignore me in yoga class this morning. I thought maybe I made you uncomfortable last night, that you didn’t really want to have anything to do with me, but you felt like you had to because it was your job. Why are you laughing?”

“I’m sorry, Dean,” Cas struggled to speak through his laughter, stopping in the middle of the trail to lean over and brace his hands on his thighs.

“What’s so funny?” Dean said, trying not to be offended that Cas was apparently laughing his ass off at Dean’s emotional vulnerability.

“Sorry, sorry,” Cas took a deep breath and wiped his eyes, “I’m laughing because I _was_ ignoring you so I wouldn’t get fired. But not for the reason you think.”

“Ok,” Dean didn’t get how that was funny, and he struggled to keep from lashing out in anger. “An explanation would be appreciated here.”

“Dean,” Cas started, coming closer and resting a hand on Dean’s shoulder, “I was worried I wouldn’t be able to act professionally around you so I avoided you. I apologize if I offended you, but I was doing my best to not offend you and everyone else in the class by pushing you down onto your mat and kissing you senseless.”

Dean stared into Cas’ blue eyes, brows furrowed in confusion and mouth no doubt hanging open in surprise. Cas just smiled and bit his lip, and Dean’s eyes flicked down to track the motion. He felt a grin making its way across his own face and he couldn’t suppress the laugh that bubbled up inside of him. “So you wanna kiss me?”

“I do,” Cas answered, tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Well, that would be ok I guess,” Dean smirked.

“You sure you won’t complain to the management that a staff member acted inappropriately toward you?”

“Cas, the only way I’m gonna complain is if you don’t kiss me right this inst—” Dean’s words were cut off as Cas pressed their lips together. Dean melted into the contact, wrapping his arms around Castiel’s waist and pulling him closer. It was a sweet kiss, over too soon when Cas pulled back just far enough to lean their foreheads together. His arms wrapped around Dean’s neck and held him close as they smiled at each other.

“I was such an idiot,” Dean laughed.

“Well to be fair, so was I,” Cas replied.

“Nah, you were just trying to be a gentleman.”

“Seems like you were too,” Cas said, then closed the small space between them to kiss Dean again. Dean opened his lips to Castiel’s tongue, suddenly desperate to taste Cas. He moaned into Castiel’s mouth as the kiss deepened. Cas pressed impossibly closer and slid a hand up to card through Dean’s hair, grasping the short strands to tilt Dean’s head to the side, giving him access to kiss across Dean’s jaw and down to his neck. Cas’ tongue slid against a pulse point beneath Dean’s ear, and Dean felt the barest brushing of teeth against his skin before Cas kissed him. Dean shivered at the feel of Cas’ stubble on the sensitive skin of his neck and he knew he should slow things down at the resulting twitch of his dick. There was no way sweats were going to hide the raging boner he’d end up with if Cas continued his ministrations.

“Speaking of being a gentleman,” Dean groaned, reluctantly pushing Cas back, “can I take you out to dinner?”

Cas laughed, and Dean relished the sound and the way it made his blue eyes light up. He resolved to make Cas laugh more often. “Only if we can go out for cheeseburgers.”

Dean laughed, feeling like he might burst with happiness, “Of course, nothing else would do.”

 

*****

 

The rest of the retreat went by all too quickly for Dean. Before he knew it, he was saying goodbye to Cas in the parking lot, promising they’d see each other the following weekend for their burger date. Dean didn’t want to wait that long, but he had to get back to work the next day, so he couldn’t extend his trip. Luckily Dean lived just over the hill in San Jose, about a forty-five minute drive from the Santa Cruz retreat, so it wouldn’t be too difficult for him and Cas to see each other fairly often. Dean had a feeling Cas was going to be a big part of his life; kinda ridiculous considering they’d only known each other for a couple of days, but there was just something about being around the guy that made Dean indescribably happy.

“Promise me you’ll let me know when you make it home safe,” Cas said, hugging Dean tight against him.

“I will,” Dean promised, squeezing Cas even tighter. They held on to each other in silence for a moment longer, until Sam interrupted by clearing his throat. “Hold your horses, Sammy,” Dean called out over Cas’ shoulder.

“We gotta get going or we’re going to hit traffic, Dean.”

“He’s right,” Cas murmured against Dean’s neck, “you should really get going.”

“I wish I didn’t have to leave so soon,” Dean pulled back so he could meet Castiel’s eyes. “This weekend has been the best I’ve had in a long time, thanks to you Cas.”

“Me too, Dean.” Cas leaned forward for one last kiss. “Now get out of here before I change my mind and tie you up in one of the cabins so you can never leave.” Cas winked, and Dean smirked, wondering just how much truth there was in that statement. He couldn’t wait to find out.

“Yes, sir,” Dean winked back and laughed as Castiel’s eyebrow rose. Next weekend was definitely going to be fun. He let go of Cas with a final peck, then turned to climb into the back seat of Sam’s Prius. He waved to Cas as Sam pulled out of the parking lot.

Jess turned around to grin at him from the front passenger seat, “So, what did you think? Did the retreat help you increase your sense of well-being and happiness?”

Dean laughed, glancing down at his phone to see a new message flash across his screen. It was from Cas: _‘I miss you already’_ and a kissy face emoji.

“Yeah,” Dean answered, looking back up at Jess, “it did.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the January [SPN Writing Challenge](http://spnwritingchallenge.tumblr.com/). The retreat is based on a real place, [Land of Medicine Buddha](http://landofmedicinebuddha.org/) (though I have never gone to a yoga retreat there or anywhere else, so if there are glaring errors or omissions it's because I made it all up based on their website and pre-conceived notions of what goes on at retreats like this).


End file.
